Collar Me... Why Do Kinksters Love Collars?

Worn by a submissive or slave to demonstrate compliance, the collar is considered a staple in the BDSM world. Secured around a submissive’s neck, collars come in all shapes, sizes, and designs and can be worn 24/7 or just for kinky fun. Let’s find out why kinksters use collars and what types are available… 

Why do kinksters love collars? 

A form of power play, collars can be used by BDSM enthusiasts to enhance a scene and denote ownership. The Dominant can exert their authority by placing a collar around their submissive’s neck, leaving the sub feeling deliciously vulnerable and ready to obey. 

For temporary or casual play, the Dominant can secure a collar around their sub’s neck to signify the start of the scene and remove it when it ends. This helps both the Dom and sub get into the right headspace and enjoy the kinky fun even more.  

Collars can also be used by those embracing a D/s (Dominant/submissive) lifestyle and can be worn regularly or permanently as a symbol of possession and obedience. Known as “collaring” the Dominant can gift a collar to their submissive as a symbol of unity – this can be done privately or via a collaring ceremony (we’ll talk more about that later), for now, let’s explore the different collars available and what they mean.  

Types of collars 

There are so many collars to choose from, you’d be forgiven for not knowing where to start. Here’s a mini-guide to give you a heads-up on what’s available. 

Posture collars  

Posture collars tend to be wide and thick, covering much of the neck. These broad collars are designed to make a statement, so if you’re on the lookout for something discrete and understated this one is not for you. Posture collars are great for play as they can limit movement and improve deportment (encouraging the sub to present respectfully).  

Play collar  

Usually worn during a scene, the play collar asserts the D/s dynamic – it’s clear to see who’s in the driving seat! Play collars come in various designs and can be made from a range of materials.  

Protection collar  

The protection collar is often used to demonstrate that a sub is “protected,” (but not necessarily “owned”) by a Dom. Typically used at fetish parties and events, the protection collar serves as a friendly warning to others, outlining that the sub is off-limits and should not be approached for play.  

Consideration and training collars 

As the name suggests, the consideration collar signifies the sub is being “considered” by a Dom for ownership or a D/s relationship. A training collar indicates the sub is receiving guidance and instruction from a Dom. Both collars are often worn temporarily (24/7 or for set periods) and can provide a “taster” of the dynamic.  

Ownership collar  

Sometimes referred to as a slave or formal collar, gifting and receiving an ownership collar is a big deal for all involved! The Dom gifts the ownership collar to their sub if they are deemed worthy. The collar can be presented privately or during a collaring ceremony and is worn to demonstrate the sub belongs to the Dom. You might opt for two collars – a more discrete day collar (perfect for public wear) and a bolder design for private times and play.  

Collar considerations 

It’s worth investing in a quality product, something that looks good, feels good, and suits your dynamic. Before you rush out and buy a collar we suggest you give some thought to the following… 

Material 

Will you go for sleek, smooth leather? Look out for collars made from top-quality full-grain leather for a luxurious finish. Or perhaps you prefer the look and feel of a shiny metal collar locked around the neck. Alternatively, you could opt for ribbon, symbolic jewellery in gold or silver, or even ink (as we’re sure you are aware neck tattoos are only for the brave)!  

Durability  

You want your lovely new collar to stand the test of time, so it stands to reason you should always go for premium quality. Choose strong bondage gear that’s made to last, such as a leather collar made with multiple layers and stitched for extra strength. 

Size 

From wide to narrow, chunky to delicate, size can, and often does matter. Wide and chunky collars make a prominent statement and can also limit movement and enhance posture. However, they can be too much when out and about (your colleagues, friends, and fellow shoppers are going to be giving you some very curious stares). For a more discrete approach, you can opt for a slender, graceful collar instead.  

Measurements  

It’s a good idea to find a collar that fits well, especially if the sub is going to be wearing it regularly or constantly. You can measure the neck in order to find the right size. If you’re buying online check out the size guide if available, this will give you an idea as to which to order. Good vendors provide size details and you’re likely to see descriptions such as fit neck size: 31-43cm (12-17”). Alternatively, look for a manufacturer that offers handmade made-to-measure collars for the perfect fit.  

Enclosure 

Some collars come with an adjustable buckle, so you can alter the size and fasten as loosely or tightly as required. Others have simple stud fastenings or clips to close and open. To make things more interesting you could invest in a collar with a lockable buckle – so the submissive remains locked in until released.  

Colour 

While traditional black collars always look good, there’s room for other designs. Metallic collars carry a shine and look equally fetching, and we shouldn’t disregard other hues of the rainbow either. There’s nothing wrong with sporting a white, red, purple, or blush pink collar – go with whatever takes your fancy.  

Hard wear 

Plain and simple or fancy and embellished? There’s room for both. Simple collars can look classy and sleek, perfect if you’re a fan of understated submission. If you prefer a more elaborate look opt for a collar with a chain, O-ring, D-ring, lettering or pendant for extra va-va-voom.  

Collar Designs  

We’ve discussed the qualities of collars, now let’s look at the different types available in more detail. You might be surprised by how many there are to choose from.  

Leather collar 

A classic handcrafted leather collar is the go-to for many Dominants as they browse for a suitable collar for their beloved sub. Quality leather not only looks good but also feels luxurious against the skin. You can go for wide, narrow, plain, or embellished.  

Metal collar  

Metal collars also look very effective against bare skin. Smooth and shiny, metal collars can be made from e.g. stainless steel or aluminium. They might be plated too – with an eye-catching silver, gold, or rose gold finish. Metal collars can often pass for jewellery, so you get to wear them out and about as a bonus.  

Ribbon collar 

Delicate and dainty, the ribbon collar is perfect for an understated look. The ribbon collar can be worn in public without attracting attention and can easily be fastened and removed. Ribbon collars come in various widths and all sorts of colours, from pastel shades to vivid hues – you can even make your own. 

Pet collar  

Good boy, now go fetch that ball. Pet play is popular amongst BDSM enthusiasts, with “Handlers” and “Owners” caring for their pets, be they cute kittens or playful pups. Keep your naughty doggy in line with a puppy leather collar, complete with a leash for added control. Take your pup for walks, tickle their tum, and force them to eat from a doggy bowl for extra fun. You can even have your pup collar engraved, with a tag featuring its name and owner (just in case they get lost at the park)!  

Shock collar 

For those who prefer their collars wild rather than mild, allow us to introduce you to the shock collar. Lock the sub into the collar and watch them squirm with anticipation as you wave the remote around and threaten to press the button. This is control with a powerful twist as the Dom delivers a gentle buzz or an electrifying jolt – depending on the infringement. You’ll find a range of shock collars on offer, with a variety of settings so you can tailor your experience.  

Embellished collar 

D-rings, O-Rings, letters, chains, and pendants can all enhance the appearance of a collar. Chains and leashes can be attached to rings, so a lowly sub can be led around a room or fixed to a post. Tags and pendants add interest and give the collar a more unique look. Collars embellished with letters can also prove effective, featuring words such as “slave,” “slut,” and “spank me,” or bespoke lettering of your choice.  

Customized collar 

We’ve just mentioned bespoke lettering and this brings us nicely to our next category, the customized collar. Customized collars - with your choice of lettering attached or an engraved pendant, are unique and bound to turn heads. The sub’s name or nickname can be added as letters to the main body of the collar, or etched onto a pendant for a special touch.  

Jewellery 

If you’re not ready for a fully-fledged collar you could start with something innocuous, such as a symbolic piece of jewellery.  

A pretty bracelet, anklet, necklace, or ring can be presented to a sub, with the premise that they wear it when in the company of their Dom (or always depending on the agreement). A necklace or bracelet featuring a padlock could be a fun way to cement your D/s dynamic.  

Tattoo or branding 

If you are looking for a permanent and extreme method of collaring you could always go for a tattoo or branding. It goes without saying that this one is not for the faint-hearted and should only be considered after a great deal of thought and contemplation. 

Collar Protocol & Safety  

It doesn’t matter if a collar is worn for an occasional play date or 24/7, a conversation still needs to be had beforehand. When it comes to BDSM scenarios and D/s relationships negotiation is key. Both the Dom and sub need to effectively communicate their expectations, desires, boundaries, and limits (inclusive of safe words and signals).  

If you can’t manage to have a full and frank discussion with your partner you shouldn’t even consider play, let alone entering into a D/s dynamic. Collaring for ownership carries significant responsibility, the sub and Dom need to understand what the collar signifies and agree to embrace this. Collaring can bring you together and strengthen your bond, providing you both understand what you’re agreeing to!  

The collaring ceremony  

If you’re part of a formal D/s relationship you might want to cement your union with a collaring ceremony. This symbolic ceremony can just involve the Dom and sub or can take place in front of a wider audience of fet friends. The ceremony is designed to demonstrate commitment and dedication and some even liken it to a wedding.  

Instead of a gold band slipped over the ring finger, the Dom places a band of leather, metal, or the like around the neck of their sub. This can be fastened or locked in place as a show of unity and a robust D/s dynamic.  

The ceremony can involve any element the couple wishes (there are no hard and fast rules). As it’s linked to BDSM a sound spanking could be the perfect way to celebrate.  

 

Frequently Asked Questions 

We’ve given you an outline of collars, in terms of why kinksters use them, and the various types of collars and their meanings. Hopefully, you’ll have a better understanding, but here are a few frequently asked questions just in case.  

What do we mean by collared kink?  

In the world of BDSM, collared kink refers to power exchange – with the Dom consensually taking control of a sub. The collar symbolizes control and the sub wears the collar as agreed during negotiation.  

What does a collar symbolize?  

A collar symbolizes ownership and is usually used to enhance a D/s relationship. This may be during a BDSM play scenario or to demonstrate and cement a long-term D/s commitment. The collar is a unique item and a couple will decide for themselves what the collar means to them.  

Can a collared sub still set limits and boundaries?  

All BDSM and sexual activities require consent and collaring is no different. The Dom and sub should negotiate collaring up front, with clear expectations and boundaries outlined.  

How many different types of collars are there?  

There’s a wide range of collars available, in terms of design and meaning e.g. a “consideration” collar implies the relationship is developing and in its early stages, whereas an ownership or formal collar demonstrates a profound commitment.  

Time to get collared  

If you’ve not used a collar before start with something easy to fasten and wear that’s not too cumbersome. It might seem daunting at first, but exploring new kinks allows you to broaden your sexual horizons and could lead to better sex and more intense orgasms.  

Collaring your sub during play can open up a world of BDSM fun for power exchange role-play and scenarios. Of course, it’s not all about kinky play, collars can also work well to enhance a D/s relationship. A collar can help you cement your union, bring you closer together, and affirm that a sub is collared and owned.   

Ready to browse for yourself and find the perfect collar? We’ve good news for you, you’ve come to the right place. Here at Mercy Industries, we know a thing or two about collars. We started in 2010 with just two products – a ball gag and a ball gag head harness. From there we introduced other lines and now boast over 400 products - from heavy-duty leather and steel to beautiful restraints, harnesses, and of course collars, in a range of eye-catching designs.  

We may have grown but we haven’t lost our way. We still source the finest real leather hides from our valued partners – small Australian businesses who believe quality counts. Our small, but very talented Mercy Industries team then cuts, sews, and handcrafts each and every product with the care and passion our customers deserve. Why not come and take a look for yourself?